Saturdays at Margeaux
by beautifulpickle
Summary: AU Youko Kurama has rightfully earned his name underground as a well renowned thief, that is, until Yomi took him under his wing in hopes to change his destructive habit. But after finding out about Yomi's wife and kid, a string of unlikely events ultimately leads him to Kuronue: a caring, yet eccentric young man that he can't manage to shake off. M/M YomixKuramaxKuronue
1. Chapter 1

(A/N: Before you guys start, this story takes place in an alternate universe in a completely made up city with some parts from my home town, also it's told mainly in Youko's POV Also, I initially rated this "mature" for now it will be rated T until sexytimes happen or whatever. But right now, there's just going to be a bunch of strongly worded language bwahahaha, so if that ain't your thing, this isn't the story for you)

* * *

Kurama has done a lot of stupid things in the past, but those were little bumps on the road he encountered in his youth and honestly, he had no excuse for what he was doing now. First off, never in his life would he think of entering a bar with the name Pink Flamingo. Secondly, frottaging in the disabled stall in said gay bar was _definitely _something he never thought he would do.

* * *

After downing two fingers of whiskey, I found myself loosen up. I don't drink that often, or go to gay bars, actually, and I don't really do anything irrational even when it comes to the most pressing matters, but sometimes life just catches up to the point where all you can do is make a string of crude decisions until you're satisfied with fucking yourself over.

Although the bar had a tacky name, at least the interior was pretty clean. Downstairs led to the club scene while upstairs had a simple trendy bar, and thankfully it was the middle of the night so the bar was nearly empty and music wasn't making the floor vibrate from the lower level. Weirdly enough, Pink Flamingo was situated smack down in the middle of the financial district, right in fucking back of the Enma publishing company where I currently work. I tried to tell myself I came here because I was in desperate need for a drink and this was the closest bar, but I knew that I couldn't fool myself.

"I'll get a whiskey, neat, on the rocks. And another one for this guy too," I heard a voice reply. "Looks like he could use another one," he mock whispered to the bartender. I turned in my seat to where the voice was coming from to come face to face with a very indistinct looking mug. He had black hair, dark eyes, and didn't really look any different from the day to day pedestrians you find around the area.

"And you are?" I asked rather rudely. He was better looking than the average person, I'll give him that, but that's more of a reason why I should keep my defenses up.

"Whoever you want me to be," he winked and gave me a toothy grin. I rolled my eyes and stood from my seat, preparing to move away. "Hey, no wait, I'm just kidding," the dark haired man said as he grabbed my arm and sat me back down on my chair. "My name is Kuronue and I swear I am not always this bad at socializing," he stuck his hand out with eager eyes.

"Kurama," I replied curtly, ignoring his handshake.

"Are you always this cold?" Kuronue asked as he retracted his hand.

"Only to men who try to hit on my by using cheesy pick up lines," I took a large gulp of my free drink, feeling the buzz kicking in.

"You're pretty intimidating you know that?" he said in a completely nonchalant manner. As if he was stating a fact rather than an insult. "But I guess you have the right to be, I mean look at you. You're absolutely stunning," it looked like he was about to reach for my face, but thought better of it when I shot him a glare.

"Thanks for the alcohol and the petty compliments but I'm not going to fuck you just because you're playing the part of a gentleman," I saw him take another sip of the whiskey, completely unfazed by my blunt remark.

"I'm not trying to be crass here, but you're at a gay bar at 2AM in the morning and you've been here for over an hour obviously waiting for something to happen. So forgive me for reading you the wrong way." His voice sounded genuinely sincere yet his comment felt like a slap to the face, mainly because it hit so close to home.

"I'm sorry if I came off rude. Mother warned me not to trust people that buy me drinks," I said after a while, slowly tracing the edge of my glass. I was drunk, I was flirting back, and this bastard was completely right. I _was _here for a reason. The reason I came to this damn place was to get _him _out of my mind, and I'd rather be losing control with someone I find attractive than some balding fat middle aged man.

He tilted his head back and laughed. I could feel my mouth dry up as I took a good look at his long pale neck. "Well sometimes you just have to follow intuition when it comes to these kinda things," he stood up from his seat and started walking to the bathroom, turning around only to beckon me to follow.

I wasn't going to follow him. I really wasn't. But his ass looked good in those jeans and tonight I had very little self control. "Fuck my life," I cursed under my breath as I followed him into the bathroom stall.

The restroom was surprisingly clean, with a little ficus in the corner and a tasteful leather couch to match, then again, I'm pretty sure people did more than go to the bathroom here. But before I was really able to scan the area, Kuronue pulled me into the disabled stall and pushed me until my back hit the door. He wasted no time as his lips crashed into mine, shoving his tongue in until I groaned, arching into the touch. He was an aggressive kisser, and I tried my best to mimic his energy, trying to go with whatever felt right. Without breaking the kiss, Kuronue lifted my dress shirt up and began to unbuckle my pants, rutting onto me as he shoved his thigh between my legs. When we finally pulled apart, his lips were red and swollen, our breathing hard and rough.

Kuronue stared at me, his dark violet eyes bore into my gold ones as he bent down to place a gentle kiss next to my ear. This sudden switch up from the energy before caught me off guard and I suddenly found myself remembering something I desperately wanted to forget. His touch was too slow, too intimate, too close to what I was used to. "Is something wrong?" he asked, stroking my cheek.

"What the hell," I huffed out as he halted everything.

"I just want to make sure you're okay with this. I don't want to force you into anything," he murmured next to my ear. Kuronue's hand traveled down to my inner thigh, stroking it lightly enough to earn him a breathy gasp.

"You're fucking kidding me right. You basically try to get me drunk, then hit on me, and now that we're in the middle of almost screwing each other in the bathroom you want to _stop?_" I asked incredulously.

"I don't want you to regret anything, that's all.," Inside the bar, Kuronue looked like the type of person who could eat a person alive. Although pretty average in physical traits, his velvety voice and bedroom eyes were a deadly combination when it came to flirting, but this man in front of me looked completely different. He locked me in a questioning gaze, a silent ask to see if I wanted to go any further.

"Don't try to be all sentimental when you're trying to have a one night stand with someone!" I yelled, suddenly feeling very turned off. "Why the hell did you even try to pick me up!"

"Because you're breathtaking," he placed a light kiss on the corner of my lips and I glared at him. He wasn't allowed to touch me that way. "And you looked like you needed to forget about something. I thought that maybe I could help you with that until.."

"Until what?" He cocked his head to the side and looked at me, like I didn't understand what he was getting at. After noticing my genuine confusion, he held my face and wiped the tears that formed there.

I was in shock. I didn't even know that I was crying. I bit my lip and cursed at myself internally, I went here to forget about today, but all I was doing was remembering. If I thought my situation five minutes ago was awkward, this was downright embarrassing. I rarely cried, I haven't cried since my mother's funeral, yet I was tearing up in front of a person I don't even know, and the most annoying part was he was staring at me with the utmost concern, almost like a lover would.

"I'm sorry," I sniffled as I used my hand to wipe my face. "This isn't what you were expecting was it?" I gave an empty laugh as I felt more tears fall.

I expected him to stop, to bolt out of the bathroom as quick as he can and leave me here in a blubbering mess. It would be easier on my pride if he did that. But to my surprise he wrapped his arms around me and kissed the top of my forehead. An intimate gesture, albeit awkward considering we just met literally ten minutes ago. "Whatever you're thinking. Get it out of your head. Stop thinking about it, just forget," he pushed me back against the door forcefully, but with less vigor than before. He stared at me, fixated on my face, looking at me as if he was sorry, as if he actually cared.

"Forget about him," he said before his lips descended down on mine, slow and languid. Without thinking, I kissed him back, creeping my arms around his neck, pulling him closer. After what seemed like forever, he pulled away suddenly (much to my disappointment) and sighed heavily. "I _was_ going to probably give you the best lay of your life, but now doesn't seem like a good time," he smiled apologetically.

"Wait, _what? _So you're just going to leave me here?!"

"What? No, I just have something better planned," Kuronue winked as his hand snaked down to my hip. "Tell you what, I'll meet you outside after you get _that _fixed." He glanced at the front of my jeans and threw me an all knowing smirk, quickly placing a soft kiss next to my cheek before darting out of the bathroom.

And that is, unfortunately, how I ended up spending 10 minutes 'tending to my business' in the disabled stall at the nearest gay bar.

* * *

"You're idea for 'something better planned' was an ice cream shop?," I wanted to literally kill this man. First he has the audacity to leave me with blue balls in a bathroom stall, and then proceeds to drag me out to get ice cream.

"In my defense, they have some great pie here too," he deadpanned.

The blinking neon light that read "Henderson's Creamery" looked inviting enough as he pulled me inside. "How the hell is an ice cream store open at three in the morning?"

He shrugged. "Don't question it, haven't you ever had an ice cream craving in the middle of the night?"

"No," I responded irritably. I was annoyed, and tired, and I was most likely acting like the worlds biggest brat, and honestly, the fact that I didn't leave right then and there surprised even me.

Kuronue shook his head at me as he placed his order. He asked me if I wanted anything and I responded by angrily turning my heel and sitting at the nearest counter seats facing the front of the window. Kuronue came back with two cups of coffee, and two paper cups which contained what looked to be vanilla ice cream with some type of nut.

"Here," he handed me a spoon as he dug into his own frozen treat. "It's my favorite, they call it Secret Breakfast," he informed me with a spoonful already in his mouth.

I rolled my eyes and picked around my own cup, taking a sample and putting it in my mouth. Fuck. It was delicious.

"What's in it," I tried to make my voice sound as uninterested as possible.

"Bourbon, cornflakes, and walnuts. You think it doesn't work but it does? Doesn't it?" Kuronue just went from a sex fiend to a five year old, and I wanted to smack myself for being so close to having a one night stand with him.

We ate ice cream and sipped coffee in a comfortable silence. The few times I glanced over at him, he was staring outside the windows with his hand on his chin, watching the almost non existent traffic trickle by. I began to feel more irritated if that was remotely possible. He was supposed to be easy to read. He was supposed to be some smooth talking sleazy guy who liked to take advantage of men that were wasted out of their minds. He wasn't supposed to be someone who actually noticed the tears of the man he was about to suck off, he wasn't supposed to be this all around nice guy that took me out for dessert in the middle of the night like I was some old friend who begrudgingly tagged along.

Kuronue took the last sips of his coffee and stared at me with the corner of his eyes. "So what happened?"

"What do you mean what happened?" I dug the spoon at the bottom of my paper cup, playing around with the liquid remnants of the secret breakfast. Kuronue shook his head and swiveled to face me, turning my own chair until I was looking straight at him.

"Whose the fucker that broke your heart to the point where you felt the need to run into the Pink Flamingo in hopes to have a one night stand with the first person who shot you a smile and offered you a drink," he leaned forward a little, his elbows rested on his knees as he stared at me intently. "You don't have to tell me if you don't want to. But for some reason I'm guessing you don't have anyone else to tell."

I grabbed the empty coffee cup, squeezing it hard enough to leave a small dent. "It was supposed to be a secret. After all, he was the CEO of our publishing company and I was just his subordinate," I began. "To make the story really short, after about a year of screwing around, I found out he as a wife and a kid. It was one of those large fancy book opening parties, I never go to those but I needed to drop off a couple of files to him and.. well the rest is really history," I suddenly felt as bitter as the coffee.

"Wow," Kuronue just stared at at me for a moment, then swiveled back to the window. "What a dick," he made it seem like I didn't get terribly crushed, like the worst Yomi did to me was accidentally break my stapler.

"He's not all that horrible though. He pulled me out of a really bad place, helped me get my life together. He made it so my life was built around him, to the point where I didn't even know how to function without him," I covered my face in my hands, too tired to try to deny how I was feeling. "It might sound pathetic but—"

"It's not pathetic." He placed his hand on my shoulder. "You should never apologize for loving someone unwillingly. And this guy might have done a lot for you or whatever, but anyone who screws around in a relationship is still considered a dick in my book."

I could feel myself trembling, all the stresses that lead up to this moment has finally been released. I didn't feel like crying anymore, yet I felt like I did just that. I felt refreshed, as if a wave of worry suddenly washed out on my shoulders. "Do you always do this?" His dark eyes stared at me for a moment in honest wonder.

"Do what?" His hand slipped from my shoulder and settled onto his lap. My left shoulder tingled slightly at the loss of contact.

"Play therapist at your local creamery." Kuronues face twisted into a smile as he shook his head. "You don't have to do all this. I would have slept with you regardless of what I was feeling," I admitted.

"You looked like you needed someone to talk to," he repeated. I sat in my seat staring outside the window, trying to ignore what he just said. I take a lot of pride in myself, more importantly, the way I act around people. For someone to just offhandedly read me like a book irked me to no extent. I didn't like getting close to anyone, I didn't want anyone to know me. Putting on an elaborate facade in front of a rather unsuspecting crowd was a talent that I never had to brush up on, the only person that managed to shatter that mask was Yomi, and even he had trouble doing that. I was far too sober to blame the alcohol for spilling everything I had to a complete stranger and that fact nearly threw me over the edge.

* * *

He drove a 1998 black Pontiac, it was in need of a good paint job, but other than that, Kuronue kept it in fairly good condition. "She's not the fanciest thing out there, but she gets the job done," he patted his car lovingly as he held the door open for me.

Kuronue leaned close to my ear and whispered, "Where to miss?" I almost whispered back "to the stars" but I was in no such mood to quote a 1997 classic.

"I don't care. Just don't take me to my house."

That place where all my belongings sat in was never my home to begin with, ever since last night, I lost that home I could go back to.

His car purred lightly as it came to life as he backed out of the parking lot and headed north. We hadn't said a word in a while and I was tired of the silence. "Do you have any music you could play?" My arms were still crossed protectively over my chest, and although I was already probably being a nuisance, I still felt the need to ask when I wanted to touch something.

"Sure, I just hope you like the Smiths. It's the last CD I put in there."

My ears were greeted to melodic strumming, and I turned my head just in time to hear Kuronue start singing along.

_So please please please let me, let me, let me __l__et me get what I want this time_

His voice was deep and comforting and I found myself being lulled to sleep by the sound of the music with the company of his voice in the background. I had no idea where we were going or how far we were headed, hell, I don't even know if this man was even safe to be around, but I was too tired to care. I turned my head lazily to stare at my driver and realized this was the first time I actually got a good look at his face. Kuronue's ears were a little too big and his chin was very pointed, his hair was pulled up into a high ponytail and his appearance (although he was dressed quite nice) had a hint of ruggedness. But he had kind eyes and high cheekbones that framed his face quite nicely specially when he turned his profile at the correct angle. My eyelids felt heavier by the second and I felt them slipping closed. Before I drifted off into sleep, I could have sworn I felt Kuronue's hand stroke my hair.

* * *

"Hey, wake up. We're here," I felt a hand shake me until my eyes shot open. The interior lights were open and Kuronue was holding _Great Expectations _on one hand.

"Huh, how long were we driving?" I mumbled as I tried to rub the sleep out of my eyes. My hair was probably a tangled and knotted mess right now but I had no energy to even try to comb my fingers through it.

"Believe it or not, you slept ten minutes before we arrived here. But you looked so peaceful that I let you sleep a bit longer."

"How long?" I yawned and brought up both my arms to stretch. My throat felt sticky from the ice cream and coffee I drank before and it left an unpleasant feeling on my tongue.

"An hour... Maybe two or three," he flipped a page from his book.

"I was asleep for _three _hours? What the hell were you doing in mean time?"

"Caught up on some much needed reading. I was going to let you sleep longer but then you would have missed the sunrise."

I peeked out the window to see that the sky was already a dark blue that slowly but surely began to lighten. We were in an empty parking lot that was situated in front of what seemed to be a large body of water. I opened the door and the smell of salt and sea instantaneously hit my nose.

"Come on, we can see it better if we go outside," Kuronue closed his book and stepped into the brisk air, climbing onto the hood of his car. He patted the seat next to him, motioning me to come over.

"The beach?" I asked as I climbed onto the top of his Pontiac. I was a lot calmer, a lot less snarky after my nap.

"I come here when I want to think," he placed his arm behind him and leaned back, his neck tilted up towards the sky as he drank in the sea breeze. The cool air whipped our hair back and I had to admit it felt a little good. I brought my legs up to my knees and huddled myself. It was cold, but not to the point of uncomfortable. "Here it comes," he pointed towards the ocean. I could see the darkness begin to fade, only to be replaced with a striking contrast of the brightest hues of orange and subtle blues. The head of the sun peeked out from the water, slowly lifting its way up to the sky. I've seen many sunrises in my lifetime, but never paid much attention to any of them. Now I was beginning to regret my decision. I looked at Kuronue only to see him staring out far into the horizon, where sea met sky. His gaze was distant, making me feel like I would have to somehow find a way to pull him out of his reverie to bring him back. He didn't sport his usual smile, but his face looked serene, content.

"Hey," I could feel his gaze on me but decided not to look "Thanks."

He didn't say anything for a while. We stared off to the sea for what seemed like forever, waiting until our clothes smelled of ocean and sand and until the sun warmed our bodies. No words needed to be exchanged, and in my own little way, even for a moment, I felt content as well.

* * *

Before Kuronue drove me home he asked for my phone.

"You aren't going to steal it are you?" I teased. He rolled his eyes and grabbed my phone, pressing the contact button and typing in his number. "You know this is a one time thing right? I usually don't go into strangers cars and watch the sun rise with them."

He shrugged and tossed my phone back to me "That's why it's up to you if you want to call me or not. I just want to make sure that you have my number if you ever need anyone to talk to." By the tone of his voice and from the look he gave me, he wasn't trying to be smooth. But he did look hopeful.

I stared at him for a moment, wondering if I should say anything, before deciding to get out of the car without a word. I didn't check if he looked at me or not as I entered my apartment, but part of me wished I did.

* * *

A/N: Thank you all for taking the time to read my work of fiction. Just a warning, this the pacing of this story is going to be a slow build up! Don't expect them to start necking by the second chapter!Also, it will be dealing with self-harm and a bunch of other heavy themes that I'll probably warn you later about.

Again, thanks for reading~


	2. Chapter 2

**(A/N: I made Youko Kurama overly sassy. I hold no regrets. Also, something about Hiei and Kurama's friendship always make my stomach flutter, because let's face it. They're the ultimate power team and their bromance is epic. Also, heaaavy language.)**

* * *

I wasn't always like this. I wasn't always amiable smooth talking member of society. I was a complete fuck up, scouting around the wee hours of the day to get my fix. Drugs were never really my thing, I would shoot up or pop pills once in a while, but I often found that boring and found out that I'd get my biggest high from the thrill of the chase. I guess in a weird unfetishized way, I would be considered an adrenaline junkie. The best feeling of complete and utter euphoria was when my adrenaline was at its peak, when on every corner there might be a chance of me getting killed. I lived for those moments, stealing and working for other people, living my life by taking only the most challenging tasks I could find. There would be times where I would have to sleep on the streets for days, not knowing where I would go next, until my next case would force me into some high end area. I was a number of faces with endless personalities, this job allowed me to change who I was each time, scout different places, never doing the same thing over. It was exciting, it was thrilling, it was my own sick way of filling this empty feeling I couldn't get rid of. After my mom died, I had no purpose in life, no moral compass whatsoever, so I allowed myself to do the only thing that gave me a remote sense of self.

My name began to sprout up from underground. They would call me Youko Kurama, named after the legendary fox. It had a nice ring to it and I was proud of the title, I was satisfied with my meaningless lifestyle and had no one to tell me otherwise. In my last mission, I was given the task to steal the account codes from the current CEO of the Enma publishing company.

Yomi was 6 feet talk with a stare that could cut glass. He stood straight and powerful and gave off an air of authority, as a CEO should. I knew guys like Yomi, guy whose egos were the size of their cocks, thinking that they own the world just because they had the future of countless other people in the palm of their greedy hands. Unfortunately, Yomi was different, and to this day I still regret not being able to see that.

He was smart. Boy he was smart. I barely had all the account numbers printed out before I felt his hands on my wrists, roughly pulling me till I was bent over his desk. Who knew that we'd be in this exact same position repeatedly for the months to come, with the exception of my pants being pooled down to my ankles. Yomi realized I wasn't just a dumb street rat when I made a snide remark about his account numbers not adding up. When I was looking up all the account information, including all the passwords, I scanned the transactions and realized someone was embezzling money from the bank accounts and stupidly let that fact slip out in the middle of cursing him out. I still remember his dumbstruck face as he quickly let go of my wrists and offered me a job on the spot.

I had no idea why I took it, better yet, I had no idea what the hell he was thinking. I had no idea why I left my life which I thought I loved so much only to work under some corporate business man I knew nothing about. But just like that, he took me under his wing, providing me support with every step of the goddamn way. He gave me my own apartment, a job, a stable lifestyle that I never really wanted, he even pulled a lot of strings just to get my name cleared from some places. Normally, I would be the worst basket case on Earth, if this was anyone but him I would have fled, burning the place down as I left. But, I wanted to impress him, I wanted him to know that even someone as messed up like me can pretend to be a functioning part of society.

One day, I stayed after hours until there was no one around but him and a stack full of papers. I crawled onto his lap, took his face into my hands and kissed him. We fucked on his chair that night, and I still get a little hot under the collar every time I walk into his office and see that faux leather seat. After I gave him permission to basically do whatever the hell he wanted with me, his touches felt more like the ones he gave me when he first pinned me down on his desk. I got the same high every time he grabbed me and threw me onto wherever he wanted to take me. He made me ache in places I never thought could ache and he would leave me gasping for breath, only to shove his tongue down my throat when I finally got that gasp of air I desperately needed. I loved every fucking moment of it, I loved walking around the office, knowing that under my dress shirt would be pretty blossoming red and purple marks from the night before. I loved the way that he would make be beg until I was near the very edge, until I was desperately keening until I found my release.

I had this sick pleasure of knowing that I was his favorite toy, and honestly I would have been fine if this whole thing was no strings attached, your typical cliché boss and subordinate type thing, but things never quite work out the way you want them to. He was sadistic in bed, but when the fun was over, he would roll on his side and lightly trace the bruises he left with his lips. He would stroke my hair until I went to sleep, and he would wake me up with long, slowly drawn out kisses. He made it seem like I was worth something, like I wasn't some hopeless cause. Y

Yomi was that new person I tried to live for. Every action, every sentence that came out of my mouth would be for his benefit to the point where my sole purpose in life was simply to live because he wanted me alive.

I really should have seen it coming. For the few people who knew me well, they knew I was careful when it came to trusting people, even then I would have my doubts. But never in my life I would ever think that I would have a deep emotional connection with another living thing. I should have known someone so respected to the public eye would have a wife. Yomi didn't really try to hide it either, and I guess it was my fault that he didn't have an ounce of remorse on his face when I saw the beautiful ebony haired woman clutch his arm and pull him into a kiss. I wasn't allowed to have emotions like this, I wasn't allowed to like him this way, I was his project and nothing more. And that alone should have sufficed.

Two weeks later and I was sitting in my office chair, throwing paper wads into the cubicle next to me, accidentally hitting Hiei in the face. He scowled as I caught the stapler he threw at my head with utmost finesse. Hiei was the first and only person I didn't force myself to interact with. He was quiet most of the time and when he spoke he tended to be quite boorish, but I liked him. He was honest while most people in this world were not, and therefore he earned my respect.

We had a sort of innominate friendship that we never declared out loud, but he usually made dreary days bearable. And most importantly, Hiei (with the exception of Kuronue) was probably the only person in the world who knew about my relationship with Yomi. I'm _very _good at hiding things, especially when it comes to covering my tracks, but everything was basically thrown outside of the window when a particularly hot day led me to take off my tie and loosen up my shirt. Even with my long silver hair covering my neckline, Hiei still managed to catch the fading marks Yomi left on my neck a few nights before. And with a click of his tongue he commented (not under his breath might I add), "I see you've been staying after hours again."I don't know how he found out or how careless I had been, but he knew. He never used it against me or said anything about it, it was simply something he found out about and chose to tell me about it.

Hiei had somehow crept into the routine of my otherwise uneventful life and settled comfortably into the everyday normality. He made things seem unchanged, like nothing had ever happened.

In a way nothing _had _happened. Yomi hasn't bothered contacting me and I wasn't too sure I wanted to talk to him either, and that night at the bar felt so far away, like I was in a lucid dream. The only thing nearly tangible from my meeting with Kuronue was the phone number I shamefully checked every night to make sure what happened wasn't a dream. I thumbed his contact info, debating if now would be a good idea to text him, when I felt a tap on my shoulder.

"Mr, Harada would like to see you in his office," a shy voice called out. Today, Yukina's mint colored hair was tied in a tasteful bun as her crimson eyes looked at me with honest sincerity like no other. Like Hiei, I had a keen eye for detail. I always wondered how a guy like Hiei, who seemed so adamant on living life independently, decided to work at a publishing company where things tended to become hectic and people swarmed the hallways on a day to day basis. Maybe it's because I pay attention to him too much, but it's easy to see when Hiei is acting out of the ordinary. At first I thought his fleeting glances at Yukina was because my short little friend had a bit of a crush, but his look was far from endearing. There was something very hard, very protective about his gaze, and that's when I noticed how similar they looked like one another. I never mentioned it to him simply because I knew he wouldn't want me to talk about it, plus I was keeping it as blackmail for future use.

"Tell him I'll come by later," I balled up another piece of paper and actually did make it into Hiei's trash bin.

"Um well," she twisted and played with her fingers as she put on the bravest face she could muster. "M-Mr. Harada made it sound urgent." Honestly if it was any other assistant, I would have just ignored them or at least given them a hard time, but Yukina was too gentle for me to hurt, plus Hiei was looking at me like he could give me a colombian neck tie at any given moment.

My gaze softened, I had a weak spot for girls like her. "All right, I'll be there in five minutes," I replied. I could have sworn I saw her give a breath of relief as she gave me a nod and sauntered off.

"Cute girl, isn't she Hiei?," my mouth twisted into a vulpine grin.

"I wouldn't know," Hiei answered through gritted teeth.

* * *

His office still looked the same as it did two weeks ago. Of course it was silly to believe anything changed in the course of two weeks, but unlike him, I couldn't look at my life the same way again. He had a wife and a kid to go back to. I had no one. I had grown accustomed to his office more than I had realized. His desk was it's usually cluttered yet somehow organized glory, and I could have sworn I could smell the leather from his couch which we would usually curl up on once no one was around. I felt small tug in my chest as I realized that I missedthis place.

"You asked for me?" I was going to make this as professional as I could. Talking on a casual level was something that would be too much for me right now.

He got up from his chair and walked towards me, stopping before he got too close to my personal boundaries.

"You seemed upset when you left the ceremony," he stepped a little closer, tentatively touching the side of my face.

"You never told me you had a wife," I didn't glare, I didn't even spit my words out. They surprisingly came pretty neutral. I didn't want a fight to break out, I didn't want to make a scene, I just wanted an explanation. I was never one to over dramatize anything, and I sure wasn't going to start now.

He dropped his hand suddenly, and I realized that I didn't want him to. I missed him, more than I would like to admit. "I didn't know that it was important. Before we started anything, I thought I told you that this was just—"

"Recreational fucking," I finished the sentence for him, trying my hardest to stare at something, anything but his face.

He stepped back, his expression unreadable. It was always hard to try and figure out what Yomi was thinking, and that was one of the many things that drew me to him in the first place.

"Look, I'm sorry if you thought this was something more than it actually was. And in a way, I guess it was my fault for letting it get to this point," his hands fell from my face and down to his side, leaving me with an empty feeling "I understand that you're angry, and you have every right to be, and the last thing I want to do is cause you anymore pain," he kept a safe distance away from me but all I wanted was for him to touch me again.

"I'm not angry," I didn't know how I looked at the moment, but I wasn't angry. I wasn't irritated, I wasn't jealous, I wasn't the slightest bit irked. But I was hurt in a way that no one can really feel because simply because I was prepared for this. I knew that he could drop me anytime he wanted to, and his attention towards me was a luxury that was coming to its close. He was more than I deserved and I knew that.

He pulled me in and held me close; I smelled the familiar scent of cologne that he remembered to put on every morning and the faint scent of ink since he had a habit of getting them all over his hands after a days work. I stood there, melting into his embrace, unable to process anything.

How was I going to live my life now? He taught me how to do everything, stripped me from my old life to get a clean, fresh start. Maybe he just had that kind of complex, maybe he liked to try to take broken things and fix them, maybe I did read too much into his touches. My heart sank as I wrapped my arms around his waist. I didn't want to let go, I didn't want to leave whatever fake paradise I had myself believing I was in. He cared about me, or made it seem like he did. In a world filled with cruel people, he was the first in a long time to show me genuine kindness without expecting anything from me in return.

But to him, I was his project. Nothing more.

I peeled myself away from him, hoping my stare was as hard and apathetic as I tried to make it seem. "So I guess this is goodbye."

His eyes widened as he placed a hand on my waist. "You're not going to quit because of all this are you?" his hands dug much harder into my hip bones and I winced from the pressure.

"Idiot, I'm not quitting. I'm just saying goodbye to all.. this" I waved my hand at him. In any other circumstance, I would have been laughing. But when he pulled away, I felt anything but happy. For a second, I thought I saw a hint of sadness on his face, but I didn't want to hurt myself even further.

He walked back to his desk and I made my way to the door before I heard him call my name. "Kurama.. If there's anything you still need. If you're at any trouble at all, I'm still here. No matter what relations we had in the past, I'll always be here if you need me," Yomi didn't even look up from his paperwork. It was as if he was just talking to a regular worker, which I guess I should classify myself as one now.

There were words I wanted to utter, words like "I need you" and "please don't leave me" and "I love you".

But I held my tongue and tried hard to swallow that lump forming in my throat because I knew that if those words accidentally slipped out of my mouth, there would be no turning back.

* * *

As if my day could get any less satisfying, being in my apartment was just the icing on the fucking cake. This place reeked of Yomi. There were books that he would often leave here, he even had a suit or two hanging far in my closet, even the small things like the stupid fox key chain he got me sparked something almost vile in my gut. I grabbed the key chain from my bedside drawer and chucked it across the room. At the moment, life sucked.

I've been doing stupid things this past month and seeing Yomi just made me want to do more stupid things. So naturally, I sent a text to Kuronue. It took him less than ten minutes to reply to my text and another half hour to arrive to my apartment after I gave him my address. I wasn't sure what I was doing, which was something new because I've always been a person to never miscalculate my steps. I was meticulous when it came to timing and plans, but Yomi always had a way to mess up the natural flow that was my life.

By the time I heard a knock on the door, I almost ran to it, first checking myself in the mirror to see if I looked acceptable, then proceeding to mess up my hair because why the hell should I look good for someone I barely know?

"Hey," was the first thing he said when I opened the door.

"What the hell are you wearing," was what I said when I got an eye full of that abomination of an outfit. I wasn't really one for fashion, but what he was wearing was practically blinding. He wore a simple dress shirt that was shocking peptobismol pink and skinny jeans that had vertical stripes of alternating white and and that same shade of obnoxious pink.

He pointed to his milk brown name tag, the name 'Kuronue' stitched in gold. "It's my uniform," he pushed yet another shockingly pink object into my hands. It was a box in the shape of a flower with the same gold which elegantly spelled _Margeaux's Patisserie & Confectionery. _

"You work at Mergeaux's?" I recalled a quaint little pastry shop not too far from my house, but the only time I saw anything from it was when someone from work brought it over.

"I know the owner and it's good money," he stepped inside of my apartment, kicking his shoes off and settling himself on the kitchen counter like he owned the place. "You're lucky, I just got off work. I hope you like cupcakes and macaroons, they were fresh from this morning and it still tastes pretty good even though it's been laying out all day."

I set down the box and sat myself down on the couch, stroking my temples. "Why are you here," I groaned.

"Because you called me over. Or maybe I was misinterpreting your text message with the words 'come over' followed by your address," he rolled his eyes.

"Exactly. Why did I call you, why the hell did you give me your number, it's like I'm losing control of everything," I threw my arms up in defeat, slumping down further into the couch.

"Dude, you called me. It's not really that big of a deal. I don't think that constitutes the fact that your life is spiraling out of control ," he opened the box and took out a green macaroon.

"That's the point, I was never supposed to call you! And why the hell did you bring me dessert!" I gestured to the pink box in front of him.

He stopped chewing the macaroon half way, looking back at the round pistachio treat then back to me. "Because they're delicious," he chewed the rest and swallowed, brushing the crumbs on his pants.

"I don't know you, I don't know why you're here," I glared at his and folded my arms. I was being a complete dick and I knew it, but I held onto my pride because it's the only thing I had at the moment.

"Look, you obviously called me because you wanted me over. There must be something on your mind so spit it out," Kuronue got up from the stool and plopped down next to me with the box in his hand.

"Today was shit," he looked at me, pausing to see if I would elaborate. "And this house.. it smells like him," I leaned my head back into the couch and shut my eyes tightly. If I sat still and focused hard

enough, I could still smell the faint sweet scent of his cologne embedded into the couch.

He picked up a light purple macaroon and waved it under my nose. "Then smell this instead, it's lavender. You can even taste it if you want,"he urged. No matter how much I tried to fight it, I felt my lips curl up into a smile. "It's tough in the beginning. But I swear it gets better," he said as his tone grew a lot more somber.

I stared straight at him and blinked a couple of times before throwing my head back and laughing for the first time in a while. "I don't even know you, yet you're coming into my house and bringing me food and acting like we've known each other for years," I guess my genuine laughter came from the shock that nice people do exist, that or the fact that I invited a complete stranger into my house.

He simply shrugged. "Well the first time I met you, I tried to get into your pants, and we kind of spent the rest of the night together. I think that's a good basis for an unconventional friendship."

I thought for a moment, taking the lavender macaroon from his awaiting fingers. Unconventional. I liked the sound of that. Maybe a simple friendship with a slightly eccentric person is what I needed at the moment. Maybe I would stop thinking so much. Maybe I would be willing to give this a shot.


End file.
